An observation (and appreciation) of friendship (and shopping:)

Posted on April 25, 2013 by Lorna

This past few years I’ve learned a lot about friendship. I’ve had to let some go (we just weren’t our best together) and I’ve gained many true, deep friends as well. I’ve had to call on my friends quite a lot during certain times and I’m still always surprised at how quickly and with ease they “show up” in my life. I’m trying to be that person too.
I’ve had the pleasure of watching some amazing moments between friends at Bodacious . Shopping together isn’t always a good shared experience. I’ve seen some horrible exchanges between mothers and daughters, husbands and wives and also between friends. But the tenderness and magic that can happen is so lovely to witness. I’ve seen several two or threesomes come through in the past couple of weeks who are so tender, complimentary and loving – excited to be together, happy to share an opinion, but with gentle words and so much love!
That’s what I recommend. If you’re shopping with your friend (or spouse or mother/daughter), pay attention to how she lights up (or doesn’t) when she comes out of the dressing room. It doesn’t matter how amazing you think she looks if she’s not feeling it.
We are our worst enemies. Trying on clothes can be very daunting and traumatic for many women. So be gentle with each other. You could say, “Are you sure you’re going to wear that?” (it’s definitely helpful if you know she already has 3 in her closet that she’s not wearing and gentle honesty is always appreciated!), but also, focus on the positive and say, “How does it feel? You are so beautiful!”
Shopping shouldn’t be hard and unpleasant. I see it as an opportunity to play, experiment with new things and have fun!
If someone comes out of the dressing room dancing, twirling or swishing, it’s time for everyone to celebrate!

Int’l Women’s Day 2013

Posted on March 7, 2013 by Lorna

I was just reflecting on all the amazing, talented and inspirational women I’ve met over the years.

From my grandma at 94 years old who inspires me every day with her love of life, appreciating each moment and in these later years, knowing it’s ok to ask for what she wants!
…to the creators of art and beauty – so many creative souls that I’ve been privileged to cross paths with.
…to the leaders who share their stories and guide others with heart, humour and strength.
…to the solopreneurs who work their asses off and give back and show up!
…to all my beautiful and wise friends and family who have held my hand along this path (especially through the challenges of the past couple of years!) and letting me hold yours when necessary.
…to all the beautiful women who walk through the doors of Bodacious every day and remind me why I love doing what I do!
…to my mom for being my mom
I honour you all and celebrate this day and every day with you!

Happy International Women’s Day!

Hooked on a feeling!

Posted on September 24, 2012 by Lorna

When a I posted this picture on facebook the other day, I received a comment about how it was too boxy and shapeless and didn’t flatter my shape. (I should’ve pushed up the sleeves:) My hasty reaction was to delete, delete, delete. Not because I couldn’t handle the criticism, but because it made me doubt myself and question what others see. What I’ve since realized (in thinking about it all weekend!), is that it provided me with the opportunity to review why I wear what I wear. Sometimes I choose to wear a very specific outfit to flatter my shape, sometimes I need to wear my high-heeled, knee-high power boots to give me strength, and other times, I’m really going after a feel or a vibe. I’m not under any illusions. I know what I look like. I know what my shape and size is. ~~But~~…AND I don’t always feel like I have to make myself look smaller or thinner or even accentuate my curves. Sometimes I want to wear a chunky sweater with rolled up jeans and my new funky boots. Do I think I look like these ladies? Absolutely not! Am I feeling the vibe that these photos elicit for me? Casual, fall, comfy, stylin’? You betcha.

There are too many rules in this world that tell us to “be” or “look” a certain way. I don’t necessarily abide by them. Why can’t we just be creative and play with our clothes? A camera captures a one dimensional image of a moment in time. It doesn’t capture how I feel when I’m walking down the street, chatting with a friend or holding my head up high and greeting a happy customer.
Often, I’m disappointed in the fact that the camera so doesn’t “get” me. That’s not how I look in my head:) And really, how I feel in my clothes (without rules or photos), is the most important piece. I hope you choose to break the rules with your fall fashion pieces. Hold your head high, own it, work it and HAVE FUN!!!

You ARE Beautiful!

Posted on December 7, 2011 by Lorna

Reposted – ’cause it’s worth reading again!

Working in the Gibsons store lately has re-opened my eyes to the challenges faced by so many women (including myself many days) in loving our bodies – unconditionally.

I’ve been in this business 11 years this year and have had hundreds of conversations with women about ‘celebrating your curves’, walking tall, focusing on the best parts of …yourself.

BUT I’ve been feeling lately that women need more support, more reminders, more challenges to stop wasting time looking and focusing on the negative.

Our bodies carry us through this world – they create and nurture babies, work at important and life-changing jobs, hold hands with friends and lovers, dance, play, strut.

Let’s acknowlege and love the differences (lumps, bumps and curves) of our bodies.

They tell our stories. They are roadmaps to how we got here and who we are today.

I’ve wasted years of my life waiting to be the perfect size before I would take a risk at looking stupid or fat in an activity. (there was that perfect moonlit night on a glassy lake when I wouldn’t get into the double kayak with my boyfriend because I thought I was too fat.

I wasn’t! In fact I’m much bigger now and have been kayaking many times and have never got my butt stuck. I missed out on a magical opportunity while watching my boyfriend paddle off into the moonlight!)

NOT doing those activities/living life/trying new things only led me to feel stupid and fat.

(Oh, and the other thing that is interesting is that you can be ANY size and still hate your body!

This isn’t an exclusive club – anybody can join.)

It’s not easy when society/media still regularly sends out messages that thin with boobs is the only normal but there are things you can do to challenge that.

Help yourself feel good by wearing a colour that makes you sing or a fabric (have you tried bamboo?) that feels like butter on your skin. Get fitted and wear the right size bra. Stand up tall and look people in the eye! Own your space. Swish those hips!

Speak clearly and demand to be heard!

And here’s one more thing you can do…

When your daughter, mom, girlfriend, bestie complains to you about their body – don’t engage!!!

Instead, tell them they’re beautiful. Tell them you don’t see them as unlovable parts but as a whole, strong and beautiful person. And maybe the next time you look in the mirror, remember those words and repeat them loudly to yourself.

You are beautiful!